The band played on

I went to early vote with my daughter on a Tuesday, arriving at the poll location just before the polls closed at 6pm. A few people arrived after me before the doors closed, including a young African American woman, her white husband or boyfriend, and their beautiful child. Standing in line, the woman loudly started asking, "Who can talk to me about this Amendment 2" - the proposed Florida constitutional ban on marriage equality. We were already in the polling place, so everyone kept quiet. The woman persisted, asking the poll worker from the Orange County Supervisor of Elections office why they wouldn't tell her about the amendment. The poll worker politely informed her that she couldn't talk about it because they couldn't discuss the issues without creating the impression that she was telling the voter how to vote.

As I stood there, I desperately wanted to speak up, to ask the woman how it would feel to her if someone told her that she and her husband or boyfriend couldn't be together, that their adorable child was the product of an impermissible union.

But I didn't want to upset the entire poll, create an inappropriate environment for the other voters, end up campaigning at a polling location. I knew that as soon as I started speaking, I wouldn't be able to stop, and that, in my conservative neighborhood, I would not have much support for my commentary. So I didn't say anything. I shouldn't have been so cautious.

The one truly sour note from the elections was the passage of state constitutional amendments in three states banning marriage equality, including Proposition 8 in California and Amendment 2 here in Florida.

Barack Obama chose not to lead on the issue, stating repeatedly that he believed marriage was only between a man and a woman. Late in the process he made a statement to MTV that he opposed Proposition 8 - the gay marriage ban - in California, but in the same sentence indicated he did not believe in gay marriage.

MTV Shows

Joe Biden chose to play games with the issue, too, concluding at his debate with Sarah Palin that he and Palin agreed on the issue. It reminded me of the worst moments of the George Bush-John Kerry town hall debate when Kerry danced around his views on abortion, vacillating and Talmudic hair splitting in order to make his reasonable pro-choice views seem acceptable to a pro-life questioner. It didn't work for Kerry, and Biden's similar verbal gymnastics made Biden look equally foolish. It was cowardly and disingenuous.

The Obama campaign obviously made a decision that taking a bold stand on the right of gay people to have a stable, married relationship with the person of their choosing was too much of a political risk.

November 4th saw one wall come down, but another wall is getting put up.